Very, very few songs start on a half-diminished chord. They are rarely used outside of jazz because of their inherently dissonant and unstable nature. Ondleton, from The Double Headed Seagulls, seemed to need it, listenership be damned.

In context, through the development of the story of this song, the dissonance can be rather pleasing: The hardest-hitting chord ends at 31 seconds. From there the song gradually becomes more and more pleasant to listen to. If you can make it 31 seconds, you will be continually rewarded with ever more pleasant harmonies.

Ondleton wasn't designed to be an asshole at first. It just ended up being that way. It was a process to get to where this song could be shared. On behalf of all the dozens of people involved with Fire, Fire, Red Star Down record label (ha!), we sincerely apologize for this gross inconvenience of harmony. We (ha!) extort you to remember that though Ondleton first punches you in the face, it will proceed to send sweeter and sweeter kisses to make up for it.

Short, rhythmic ambient track with melodic fragments caught in a web of delay and reverb. Available on Bandcamp, exclusively:

https://firefireredstardown.bandcamp.com/track/aelia

Slimline feels exactly what it's like to be in your own mind, totally aware of it, and not giving a damn whether or not anyone actually cares about it. You are deeply into your solitude, and that's all.

Musically, Slimline is a relatively noisy album but an ultimately human listen. Elements of IDM, experimental, ambient, big beats (at times), supremely layered guitars, and intensely personal.

For optimal listening, allow yourself to be over-caffeinated after the sun goes down. It's best to be around people, so go to a coffee shop that's open 24 hours and enjoy the ambiance.

Suggested activities: Write in a journal, do some programming, enjoy the process of doing some intensely detailed art. Completely ignore every other person around.

BONUS: Included is a PDF of the original name of the Double Headed Seagulls: The Arms Race. This was a document that I planned upon putting on a website somewhere, but just never happened (until now!).

A Message From The Sidekick:

"My older brother Dave Wirth is such an insufferable know-it-all. I swear, he's such a loser. He's got you fooled! Don't believe a word he says! He's a loser face who doesn't know anything at all! He's a nerdfacelooserbrainstupdhead!!!1 What a butthead! What an annoying soccer jock! He thinks he's god's gift to music and he's not!!!!  HAHAHAHAHA!!!! ahshdfhdjhhfjdhfa;wnerioqw93ngnsd!!!! What a stupid!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"

Ahem, okay, this is why my little brother doesn't get to use my computer. I took his computer away from him long ago so that he doesn't put this dribble out there and clog up the internet. This is what I get for being generous and putting his music out...

The world most strange mashup of children's melodies and metal is out today...

The Sidekick’s new record Songs For Children is probably the wildest, most kinetic, most joyful, most demanding, most insane album of 2020, if not the decade

Songs For Children mashes up metal, IDM, experimental, jungle electronica, and childrens melodies all into one weirdly intense experience. Seriously. It’s like Melt Banana and Messugah and Judy Garland got into a fight armed to the teeth with switchblades and there is blood everywhere.

Don’t judge this book by it’s cover: Songs For Children is without a doubt the most demented album you will ever hear.

Modular synthesizer enthusiast with physical disability hacks his arm prosthesis to control synthesizers with his mind:

Junk Bullet Magazine.mp3

The Sidekick

Junk Bullet Magazine, by my crazy younger brother The Sidekick, is the first song off of his super spazzy electronic robot record, SAGA! …the story of a boy and his computer. He also mentioned that he’ll seriously try to refrain from making fun of you for listening to it.

Get this music!

The Sidekick: SAGA! ...the story of a boy and his computer

$4.99

Get your spaz-attack sugar-high on with The Sidekick. My annoying younger brother will try, probably unsuccessfully, to make you dance.

Add to cart

SAGA! …the story of a boy and his computer, was originally released in 2004.  Mr. Sidekick finally figured it was in his best interests to let his music be rereleased (it took some convincing). Upon being asked about the reissue: 

Wait, you? Seriousy? I mean, wha? Why? Youre a freaking loser and I don’t know why were even talking, poop-head. 

OH WELL, GO AHEAD LOSER-FACE, SEE IF I CARE. 

Okay then, green light. If you are looking for light-hearted, fun, naive electronic music, look no further.